Waiting to Be Told What To Do

Permission to be great comes from within, defining what great means is the work we do together.

Everyone wants to be told what to do. We are conditioned to be that way from when we are children but that is not how an adult handles decisionmaking and that can be a difficult realization to make. I don’t tell people what to do, that’s just an exercise in academia and a distraction from what is really important. After all, I would not actually be helping the person I’m coaching if I just told them what to do.

If I had to really define coaching in a few words I’d say that it’s an experiential partnership. The great thing about the type of coaching I do is that we are continuously running our own programs on ourselves and eachother. So, what I may be asking you to reveal or do is not very different from what I’m doing in my own coaching and personal growth program.

I know first hand how challenging change can be because I am constantly doing it myself. I have people that hold me accountable as well so It’s not at all like a teacher/student relationship. We really are walking side by side as equals.

One of the big realizations I’m lucky enough to be a part of with people over and over again is the ah-ha moment that there is no pause button for life. When people really grasp that one is always moving in a direction, whether it’s intentional or not, there is this kind of change that comes over them.

Take relationships for example. Relationships do not stay the same. They are either growing, getting deeper and more connected or growing apart. There is no sameness. The feeling of stagnancy is simply what we have adapted a lack of forward progress to mean. It’s super clear when a relationship is moving forward but it’s not so clear when it’s moving apart, usually until it’s too late and there is so much negative momentum built up that it just explodes. Denial and fantasy are coping mechanisms we have all used to one degree or another and ripping off that bandage can be as painful as it is freeing.

I excersize forward movement whenever possible, especially in the physical surroundings of my office. My office is very feminine. I simply love being in it with it’s pale colors and comfy shag carpet but I don’t try and keep it the same. I am constantly adding and taking things away. I move things about and constantly make improvements to reflect the best space I can possibly imagine. There is a profoundly positive effect to surrounding yourself with beauty and I love to help people connect with that sense of self and belonging.

If you feel disconnected from your feminine side and feel like your surroundings don’t match you on the inside we have some very fun work to do together that can really put positive feelings back into your life. Don’t settle for the grind or sameness in your life. Try instead to stop and literally smell the roses. When is the last time you did that? If it’s been way too long, we should definitely sit down and chat.